Saturday, March 20, 2010

First day of Spring  Not a very happy day for me.  We've gone full circle with the seasons and we are back to Spring.  I don't even remember Summer.  It blurrs with the freeway trips to rehab. I don't remember Summer at all.  Fall was when we moved into life at home, when the church people moved in, when therapy was easy because it was here. Fall was almost fun.   Winter was dark because the electricity in the house stopped working and I couldn't afford the $2500 quoted to fix it.  Winter was smelly because the plumbing went bad 3 times until we finally paid for a big root killing-drilling job. Winter was sad because my dad died.  And now it's Spring. 

I watch people work in the garden.   I hear friends complain about working hard with their husbands, cleaning up their yards.  Spring seems to bring new life and energy.  But to us, it's the same.  The season doesn't matter. What matters is standing practice, or a "doughnut" to relieve the bottom end that gets much too much use.  What matters is 20 minutes in the "bounce" chair.  What matters is meds at the right intervals and bowel movements.  It could be Summer, or Winter, or Fall.  It doesn't matter. 

What does matter is remembering.  We now have electricity because a young man who found a home with us for a year, when he really needed one, just appeared one day and fixed our problem.  It's been 15 years since he lived here, but he said that he would charge us a year's rent for the repair.  Nice.  It took him several days and lots of crawling around in very dirty places, but we are now well lit. 

Last night was a Spring cleaning night at the shop.  I asked my dealers for help.  "Will work for food."
Fifteen people came and worked very hard organizing, dusting, decorating.  I was overwhelmed with the progress and the willingness that everyone had to pitch in and help out.  The garage had become almost unenterable and it is now amazingly organized.   Jed stayed home alone.  That was his gift to me. I cried when I left him because he felt so helpless. 

We will get through this.  We give to each other the meager gifts we have to give.  Mine is willingness, his is patience.  We hold each other up and look forward.  The second day of Spring will be better.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for sharing this with me. When I feel down and out, you are not far from my thoughts. I love and admire you so much - it is beyond words. And here it is, the fourth day of spring.